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TMZ just posted this video clip of an upcoming Victoria's Secret ad. Their biggest mistake was letting Klum open her mouth and "be funny". From the captured picture of this video short, I thought, "Hey, Heidi Klum's gonna be loving up her own knockers. Of COURSE, I want to see that."
And then she started talking and chased my boner away...
Anyways, here's video a pretty attractive young gal, wearing a very attractive bra on a very, very attractive rack, ruining the whole thing by...improvising her own dialogue.
Fuck man, Del was right. Women really aren't funny.
For a pointed lesson on a much more effective use of boobs to advertise your product, consider this really wonderful Jeep Ad...
I would buy that....Jeep...tanktop...whatever they're selling there, I would buy it.
Cheers,
Mr.B
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6 comments:
Lots of women are funny. Professionally funny, even. You know a bunch of them. Heidi Klum is not paid the big bucks for her sense of humor, if ya know what I mean.
I should be more careful. A "knowing wink" doesn't really translate via text. I was just kidding about "women not being funny". I don't think that comedic talent is gender-specific.
Carol Burnette. Lucille Ball. What-ser-face from Seinfeld. ALL of the women on "The Office" (except Kelly). And about a dozen or more talented female improvisers that I personally know.
All fine examples of smart, talented funny ladies.
(Oh and I think my girlfriend is one of the smartest funniest girls that I know. She regularly makes me laugh with some throwaway bit that she just made up on the spot.)
So, yeah, Girls are funny too. I think that Del might've missed the mark on that one. (And he performed with Barbara Harris and Elaine May on a regular basis. How could he not've noticed how funny women could be?)
I think Heidi Klum, though, is a bit thick in the head. And this effort to make her look "fun" or "Sassy" is just off-putting. The train jumps the tracks when she uses her own boobs as machine-guns. Her editors fucked her by putting that clip in there.
I think that if I were to meet Ms.Klum at a party, I might try to find someone else more interesting, to talk to. Me and this other more interesting person might even discuss Ms.Klum's alarmingly attractive breasts. As long as she, herself, weren't involved in the conversation. She might spray us with nipple-bullets from her breasty machine-guns.
Cheerio!
Mr.B
Before watching the video, I was going to disagree with you, just out of the need to be pissy.
But then I watched it. Yeah, you're right. Shut her up.
I know you were kidding. But it's the kind of thing that really rankles. I've heard the asinine, "Why can't women improvise?" conversation a few too many times to smile at something like that.
Of course, there's another issue in play here. It seems like as long as Heidi or others like her (didn't you have effectively the exact same reaction to that porn star a few weeks ago?) remain mute, desirable objects for men to project their fantasies onto, they're fulfilling their role in society, and woe to them if they try to do otherwise. Kind of sad. Of course, I can't feel too bad. That's the bargain they made to sell calendars and push-up bras to the masses. If Heidi, or her handlers, have made the poor decision to let the cat out of the bag--that this supernaturally beautiful woman may be kind of lame and goofy--then more fool them.
Beside, everyone knows that breasts go "pew pew pew" when you shoot them.
Also just to add something...Heidi Klum may not be hysterical in this clip but she isn't dumb. She speaks about 3 more languages than most of us and is very well read and donates a ton of time and money to charity.
I'm not saying she's a rocket scientist but nice boobs and blond hair don't equal a stupid woman who should remain silent.
Luckily this is your blog so you can say/think whatever you want. I just had to chime in.
just my two cents for what they are worth...in this case...two cents. :)
Wait a sec...let's not confuse "The Lady Who Is Nearly Naked To Sell Fancy Brazzieres Should Not Try To Be Funny, Because She's Painfully Unfunny"
with
"Women Should Shut The Fuck Up And Not Try To Be Anything But Silently Passive Sex Objects."
They're not the same thing.
Of course, women are funny. It seems such an elemental thing to know that I can't believe I am typing it. Similarly, women are whole, beautiful human beings that aren't to be defined by their gender or their sexuality. That's also something so fundamentally understood that it doesn't need to be stated.
Polish Porn Queens can have deep husky mannish voices and Noted Humanitarian and Boob Model Heidi Klum can be a boor. Michael Jackson (when he was black) said it best when he said, "You're free to be you and me."
Dig?
Also, I love you ladies and genuinely appreciate your contributions to this silly little blog. It keeps me honest. You're the best.
Cheers,
Mr.B
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